LINK'S MISSION
by Nakaia Aidan-Sun
Summary: *complete* LINK WANTS TO FIND OUT WHO PIERCED HIS EARS
1. Lon Lon Ranch

Link's Mission  
  
~Link's Diary~  
  
Day one:  
  
I beat Ganon last night it was tough, but I did it. Zelda was going to send me back to be a Kokiri, lucky I managed to talk her into letting me stay until I find out something…who pieced my ear(s).  
  
The suspects are the following:  
  
*Rauru:  
  
~ I suspect him because he was the first one I saw when I woke up from seven years of sleep.  
  
*Ganon:  
  
~Why I suspect him…nobody knows. Well, maybe it's because...um HE'S A BAD GUY, duh.  
  
*Zelda  
  
~You see when ever she's around my I get this weird feeling and  
  
her face sometimes turns red.  
  
I'm going to start right now, no wait on second thought I'm going to go to sleep. So, I'll start asking people tomorrow.  
  
Day two:  
  
Last night was great, I had a wonder night's sleep and dreamed about…Oh yes I forgot that I'm supposed to be telling about my interviews.  
  
*Interview #1:  
  
Epona, the horse  
  
~I interviewed Epona, she was one tough horse I couldn't get a word out of her. I have to understand why.  
  
*Interview #2  
  
Billy, the evil super chicken  
  
~Billy was just as tough as Epona…maybe they know something.  
  
*Interview #3  
  
Malon, the farm girl  
  
~Malon…I asked her the following questions and got her answers.  
  
1: Malon, can I ask you some questions?  
  
~Sure why not  
  
2: Okie dokie, Malon, what is your name?  
  
~Um…you just said it loser.  
  
3: So, you just said it loser is your name right?  
  
~No, my name is MALON  
  
4: Did you piece my ear(s)?  
  
~No  
  
5: Did Zelda piece them?  
  
~No  
  
6: Did Rauru?  
  
~Yes  
  
7: Why didn't Epona answer me?  
  
~Because she's a horse of course  
  
8: Is it Ketchup or Catsup?  
  
~Catsup  
  
Okay those were my interview for today I report back tomorrow and tell you about my interviews with Zelda and Ruto.  
  
  
  
Okay, I know this was the DUMBEST story ever so please review and tell me what you think about it. I will try to update it at least once a week. So if you have any ideas of what I should do please write it in your review or send it to Evil_chicken_billy@yahoo.com. 


	2. Hyrule Castle

Chapter 2  
  
Day 3:  
  
Okay, I just got back from Hyrule Place...So, I guess you just want to know what happened in my interviews.  
  
Interview # 4:  
  
~Bob, the guard.  
  
The interview went as follows.  
  
1-Mister Guard guy, can I ask you some questions?  
  
Sure  
  
2-What is your name?  
  
Bobby Bo Bob Robert Joe  
  
3-Okay, can I call you Bob?  
  
No  
  
4-Okay, Bob, did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
5- Did Zelda?  
  
No  
  
6- Did Impa?  
  
Maybe  
  
7- Did Rauru?  
  
Yes  
  
8-Is it Catsup or Ketchup?  
  
Ketchup  
  
Interview #5:  
  
Impa, Zelda's guard  
  
1. Can I ask you some questions?  
  
Sure  
  
2-Did you piece my ears?  
  
Yes, but Rauru helped...he sat on you.  
  
3-Did Zelda?  
  
No  
  
4-Did Rauru?  
  
I already told you  
  
5- Is it Catsup or Ketchup?  
  
Ketchup  
  
6- Why does Zelda's cheeks turn red sometimes?  
  
Because she likes you  
  
Okay that didn't go well...I'm going to go to sleep now...no wait...I already interviewed Zelda...so here it goes.  
  
Interview #6  
  
Zelda, the princess of Hyrule  
  
1-Zelda, can I ask you some questions?  
  
Sure  
  
2-Did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
3-Who did?  
  
I don't know  
  
4-Do you like my ears pieced?  
  
Yes  
  
5- Do you like me?  
  
(Note: her cheeks turned red) Yes  
  
6- Is it Catsup or Ketchup?  
  
Ketchup  
  
Okay so that is really all...no wait...okay that really was.  
  
A/N: Okay, I will update it on Monday. So until next time peace...wait can you please put in you review if you think it's Ketchup or Catsup. 


	3. Zora's Domain

I don't own Zelda  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Day 4:  
  
Okay, today I rode Epona most of the way to Zora's domain...I don't know why but she never want s to go the whole way...although I can't say that I blame her...Ruto...shivers...Well, then I walked the rest of the way. I got to the waterfall and found out that I had forgotten the song to get in. That's when Sheik turned up. So, she played me the song and I interviewed her.  
  
Interview # 7 (I think)  
  
Sheik  
  
1. Can I ask you some questions?  
  
Sure, but Link...I'm Zelda remember you've already interviewed me.  
  
2. Okay, Sheik, do you enjoy cross-dressing?  
  
No, but...okay...maybe I do.  
  
3. Did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
4. Do you know who did?  
  
My guess is Rauru.  
  
5. Can you get off my foot?  
  
Ops...(she got off my foot) Sorry  
  
6. Did the Canadian's get cheated out of their gold metal in the Ice dancing part of the Salt Lake 2002 Winter Olympics??  
  
Heck yes!!!  
  
7. Is it Ketchup or Catsup??  
  
-_-` (She disappeared)  
  
And so I went on in to Zora's domain. The first person I came upon was Ruto.  
  
I asked her the following questions.  
  
Interview # 8  
  
Ruto, the fish girl/women/thing  
  
1. Do you hate me?  
  
No  
  
2. What can I do to make you hate me?  
  
Nothing.  
  
3. Kuso, are you sure?  
  
Yes  
  
4. Did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
5. Who did?  
  
Rauru  
  
6. Is it Ketchup or Catsup?  
  
Fishup  
  
After that of course I ran away from the evil fich woman. And ran into King Zora...ouch. I would advise you against it...it really hurts.  
  
Interview # 9  
  
King Zora, The big fat blue king dude  
  
1. Can I ask you some questions?  
  
Sure  
  
2. How much do you weigh...I mean did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
3. Who did?  
  
I don't know  
  
4. Is it ketchup or catsup?  
  
Fishup  
  
Okay so that's all of my interview. I don't know what fishup is and I don't think I want to find out. Well, I've got to go the fish girl is after me.  
  
A/N: "You need some intelligence on this journey...quest...thing" Peregrin Took (Pippin) Fellowship of the rings... (movie) Until next time Ja-ne. 


	4. Two weird ppl

Chapter 4  
  
Day 5:  
  
Okay...today, I am going to interview 2 fanfistion.net authors...first of all Lei-chan.  
  
Interview # 10  
  
Lei-chan, an author  
  
1. May I ask you some questions?  
  
Yes  
  
2. Did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
3. Who did?  
  
I'm not going to tell you  
  
4. Who's a prettier Pony...Bill (Lord of the Rings) or Epona?  
  
Bill the pony  
  
5. Why?  
  
Because he was in the same movie as my husband  
  
6. You mean he was in the same movie as Trunks?  
  
No, my other husband  
  
7. ::coughes:: polygamist ::coughes:: Which one?  
  
Legolas Greenleaf  
  
8. Is it Catsup or Ketchup?  
  
Ketchup  
  
Interview #11  
  
Lili Baggins, a.k.a. Karson-chan the evil chicken  
  
1.May I ask you some questions?  
  
No  
  
2. Why are you writing this story?  
  
What if I'm not???  
  
3. Why do you call yourself ::reads paper:: Lili Baggins now instead of Karson-chan the evil chicken?  
  
Because Lili is my Hobbit name and I am married to Frodo Baggins.  
  
4. Did you piece my ears?  
  
No  
  
5. Do you know who did?  
  
I plead the 5^th  
  
6. Um...what does I plead the 5^th mean?  
  
::hands him a copy of the bill of rights::  
  
7. What has your favorite Olympic event been this year?  
  
::drools:: Men's figure skating...::thinks of Timothy Gadon (bronze medallist)::  
  
9. How many husbands does Lei-chan claim to have?  
  
I don't have enough fingers.  
  
10. Is it catsup or ketchup?  
  
That is one of those things that men kind will never know  
  
A/N: What can I say I ran out of ideas...well, next time should I have him interview ppl from Middle-Earth (Lord of the Rings) or what...please give me some ideas. 


	5. S.R.G.I.T.S.C.

Chapter 5 (I think)  
  
Day 6:  
  
Well, here is my next interview…this interview is of. ::drum roll:: Some guy Lili Baggins danced with at the school dance and didn't bother finding out his name because she was too busy plotting how to kill Lei-chan for dancing with Josh Newbury…never mind. Well now that the AUTHOR has stopped writing in my diary…here is the interview.  
  
Interview #6:  
  
Some random guy in the school cafeteria  
  
Can I ask you some questions?  
  
S.R.G.I.T.S.C.: I kinda busy dancing here  
  
Lili Baggins: He means yes  
  
Did you pierce my ears?  
  
S.R.G.I.T.S.C.: Who are you?  
  
Will you shut up?  
  
S.R.G.I.T.S.C.: but you wanted an answer  
  
Is it ketchup or catsup?  
  
S.R.G.I.T.S.C.: Listen your scaring me, sorry Lili…I'm going to go running away from this nerd.  
  
Okay that interview really didn't go well…to tell you the truth I think that our author has lost it…why you may ask…because she kept dancing with thin air even after the dude left.  
  
A/N: Okay this might seem like a really dumb idea…but I really did interview the guy who asked me to dace with him at the Valentine's dance…and I really don't know his name… And oh yes…Lei-chan run when you still can Josh is supposed to be mine!!! Even if he is mad at me for being a Jerk. Just one more note…I'm going to change my pen name to Lili Baggins the Evil Chicken so just remember the evil chicken part. 


	6. Kokiri Forest

A/N: I don't own anything. Well, here's my next stupid chapter/interview/thing. If it's not good please feel free to tell me. I'll be updating this next when I have 31 reviews.  
  
1 Chapter 6  
  
Day 7:  
  
This morning I was walking around when it hit me…I haven't interviewed the little people in Kokiri forest. So here it is my next set of interviews.  
  
Interview #7:  
  
Mido, the loud-mouthed one that nobody likes  
  
1.Did you pierce my ears?  
  
No  
  
2. Do you know who did?  
  
No  
  
3.Do you know who I am?  
  
No  
  
4. Did you like that kid named Link?  
  
No  
  
5. Do you know that I am Link?  
  
No…what?  
  
6. Never mind…is it ketchup or catsup?  
  
What???  
  
Well, that was unproductive.  
  
Interview #8:  
  
The long haired dude by the door  
  
Do you have a name?  
  
Yes  
  
Did you pierce my ears?  
  
No  
  
Did you like that Link kid?  
  
I wonder if He will ever come back.  
  
Um…dude…What if I was Link and he wasn't a kokiri?  
  
No way  
  
Is it catsup or ketchup?  
  
Catsup  
  
Interview #9:  
  
Saria, the forest sage/my life long friend  
  
Did you pierce my ears?  
  
Truthfully…no  
  
Do you know who did?  
  
My guess is Mido…::coughes::not::coughes  
  
Is it fun being short forever?  
  
What kind of a question is that?  
  
Can I use you as an armrest?  
  
No!!  
  
Is it ketchup or catsup?  
  
Both depending on who you ask  
  
Interview #10:  
  
Skull Kid  
  
((A/N: MD if you are reading this I'm kind of using your idea…please don't be mad at me))  
  
Did you pierce my ears?  
  
NO  
  
Do you know who did?  
  
CAN I USE A LIFE LINE?  
  
Do you watch too much TV?  
  
YES  
  
Is it Ketchup or Catsup?  
  
KETCHUP  
  
Why do you talk in All Caps?  
  
WHY DON'T YOU?  
  
  
  
Well, there are my interviews for today. Now I'm off to interview my pillow and blanket and bed…and ::coughes::teddy bear::coughes  
  
A/N: Well, that's that…now review or face the wrath of Joe the Ickyasaurus. Who I named after watching him on a discovery channel show. Well…no I'm off to some or other. Ja-ne 


	7. Hobbits

A/N: Sorry it took me so long.but I'm back.well kind of I hope you like it.  
  
Chapter 7  
  
Day 8: Today, I came into a strange place called Hobbiton. I came across many strange people called hobbits, who were even shorter then the Kakori. Here are my interviews.  
  
Interview #11:  
  
Frodo Baggins  
  
What is your name? Frodo Baggins Why do you only have nine fingers? None of your business Why are you short? I'm a Hobbit Is a Hobbit like an old kakori? An old what? Did you pierce my ears? I don't even know you Is it ketchup or Catsup? Neither, it's tomato sauce  
  
Interview #12:  
  
Samwise Gamgee  
  
What is your name? Samwise Gamgee Why are you pulling weeds? I'm a gardener Why? Because my father was Did you pierce my ears? I most certainly did not Are you sure? Yes Is it Ketchup or Catsup? Tomato Sauce  
  
Interview #13:  
  
Peregrin Took What is your name? Pippin What is your relationship to Frodo Baggins? Well, he's my second cousin once removed on his mother's side and my fourth cousin twice. Okay, that's enough.Why are you taller then him? (points to some random hobbit) Ent water  
  
Did you pierce my ears? I don't think I did Is it Ketchup or Catsup? Oh it's the red stuff  
  
Interview #14:  
  
Meriodic Brandybuck  
  
What's your name? Merry Merry.(laughes)..that's a girl's name.why? It's short for Meriodic. Oh, did you piece my ears? No Are you sure? Yes Is it Ketchup or Catsup? Um.both  
  
Okay, that's all well until next time live long and eat cheese.  
  
A/N: hehehe I finally did it 


	8. Three Old People

Chapter 8  
  
Day 9: Today I'm going to interview three old people named, Gandalf, Grandpa Simpson, and Santa Clauses.  
  
Interview #15.I think.  
  
Gandalf, the wizard  
  
Did you piece my ears? No Are you sure? Yes So, you're a wizard? Yup What does a wizard do? Sorry, I'm kind of busy. Is it Ketchup or Catsup? Tomato sauce  
  
Interview #16  
  
Grandpa Simpson  
  
Did you piece my ears? No What is death? Well, when you're my age it can be anything and you pretty much see it everywhere.Ahh.death No that's a baby with a red thing in it's mouth.What is your name? Ahh.Death Is it Ketchup or Catsup? Ahh.Death  
  
Okay that was well, a waste of time.  
  
Interview #17  
  
Santa Clauses  
  
Did you piece my ears? Ho ho no Why are you fat? I eat too many cookies and drink to much milk. What am I getting for Christmas? I can't tell you that. Is it Ketchup or Catsup? It depends what bottle it's in.  
  
To think I've been on this quest/mission/thing for over a week now.Nine days down.and still so many questions yet to find answers.  
  
A/N: Okay that was short and dumb.but at least I'm updating right? Sorry, I might not update my stories that much this year, but you can blame that on Homework.I have 3 honors classes and one AP class.plus I'm Flight Sergeant in my AFJROTC class. 


	9. The end

Chapter 9  
  
Day 10  
  
Well, I thought you might like to know that today I did find out who pieced my ears.you see it went like this.I walked into a comic book/Manga store and I saw this person reading a manga/comic book. So, I looked over my his shoulder and saw a picture of Impa piercing my ears.So know I know the answer to that question.but the Ketchup or Catsup on still confuses me.and why didn't the chicken or Epona answer me. Well, live long and eat cheese. Link  
  
A/N: okay I think this will be the end.if you have an idea for a sequal will you please tell me in a review. Ja-ne. 


	10. This doesn't have a name

A/N: I know that I finished this story.but if you have any ideas for a sequel will you plz tell me in a review??? I need help.in more ways then one. ~Ezri Dax~ 


End file.
